mooncake festival..nono,
lantern festival? no..mooncake festival?
nvm nvm.
wtvr it is,
its definitely
LETS FREAKING DEMORALISE ness NIGHT.
its
LETS MAKE her FEEL SO BAD NIGHT.
its
shes SO FREAKING STUPID
LETS MAKE her FEEL WORSE NIGHT.
thats exactly the reason why i
didnt want to go sit there with you both
cuz i knew it was coming.
Did you study today?
no -stare- Why?
and then i give my reply and get stared at some more.
i didnt go there to get nagged at,
to feel demoralized,
to feel horrible abt myself,
to feel horrible abt existing.
i swear if i had the guts to kill myself
i would write a letter to
her
to tell her how hurt i am.
and i'll make her feel so guilty.
"im not comparing"
yea right. youre the best la.
you go for exchange programs.
youre the first valedictorian for crez.
you get a scholarship.
youre smart.
you get straight As.
you get some arty farty prize
which is some thousand dollars thing.
so yah.
WHO AM I COMPARED TO YOU?
so proud to have someone like you in my life.
cuz youre someone i can look up to.
but i hate how i cant follow in your freaking footsteps.
my "productivity level isnt as high as yours in canada"
-quote guess who! im obviously not as smart.
i can admit that im not smart
atall. just dont compare.
i hate
detest
totally
loathe it.
i have been studying this hol,mind you.
mind YOU ALL.
anw i dont.
dont have the guts to.
dont want to.
if i could kill myself and still go to heaven,
then i just might.
sometimes i want to.
so that everyone would feel sad
that im gone.ahaha.
so that everyone will realize
and yah,
be sad.
*shrug-
just a stupid thought.
thank goodness shes not reading this.
i'd just die.
ahaha. die..
just as i told eder..
"i stayed over at cins house last night.
got home at arnd four plus..
then meet nings to stardy at five.
stardied till arnd seven
at bk's.
then came home
took my bath
and have been online since.
i am SUCH a slacker.
its disgusting.):
--
2325h. monday night.
its suddenly so quiet.
just the rain.
and me
banging the keyboard.
i love the rain
i love the rain!
i wish it would rain forever.
no wait,
i dont.
but still!
i love the rain
i love the rain!haha
aii.
monday is over.
--
ahhh.cins sisters babysitter is so sweet!
(:
cindy tanaga is having tootion now.
and im sitting here
in her study room
with the nice flatscreen
highspeed internet
waiting
blogging
and
talking to nd.
anyways she brought in milo and two funny/cute looking
white and green buns.ahaha.
super cute.haha.
and she was like "hallo" and stuff.
the cin hallo way. *grin
anyways we talked till arnd five then we slept.
and the poor dear had to get up
to complete her ingleesh tootion work.
soyah.im going home soon.
haha.(:
